One hundred years of research and science has given rise to a verifiable truth: Many popular child-rearing methods — long viewed as harmless alternatives to spanking — can drive deep divisions in parent-child relationships and damage children’s self-esteem.
These methods include punishments (such as threats, timeouts, grounding, revoking privileges, and docking allowances), as well as rewards (such as trinkets, star charts, and bribery.)
And, yet, for many parents, these methods seem to be the only thing keeping their households from dissolving into chaos. Take away their most useful parenting tools, and how can they expect their homes to function properly? How will they enforce limits, end conflict, and maintain authority?
The answers to all these questions — and so many others — reside in ParentShift.
Written by parenting educators Linda and Ty Hatfield and award-winning journalist and author Wendy Thomas Russell, this timely, compassionate guide distills a century’s worth of research, science, and wisdom into an engaging, practical handbook for modern parents.
Built around ten universal truths that explain why all children behave the way they do (often at the most inopportune times!), ParentShift argues that only one child-rearing model — a model the authors call heart-centered — gives children what they need while honoring their ages, stages, and temperaments.
As innovative as it is inspiring, ParentShift mines the work and advice of the world’s leading experts to bring you complete toolkits designed to solve virtually any problem — from toddler to teen — while strengthening the parent-child relationship and preserving each child’s sense of self-worth.
Endorsements for ParentShift
“ParentShift is aptly named. It is an encyclopedic exploration of the most effective methods for giving children the courage to realize their full potential.”
ADELE FABER, author of How To Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk
“Linda and Ty Hatfield’s heart-centered approach, presented in this book with Wendy Thomas Russell, helps parents develop the skills to move beyond punishment and rewards, sidestep power struggles, and strengthen the parent-child relationship . . . ParentShift works because it changes the way you SEE your child. It should be on every family’s bookshelf.”
LAURA MARKHAM, author of Happy Parent, Peaceful Kids
“A must-read for parents, caregivers and grandparents. The authors give practical, down to-earth options for the everyday issues, conflicts, and roadblocks that we all experience, while helping our children become responsible, resilient, resourceful, compassionate human beings who know how to think—not just what to think.”
BARBARA COLOROSO, author of Kids Are Worth It!
“ParentShift exposes the fake news of the necessity to discipline and control children, and replaces it with the true news that children are harmed by domination and thrive on connection, unconditional love, and respect. While quoting the work of many reputable authors and researchers of the last fifty years, the authors provide parents an incredibly powerful and clear system to shift their way of being from gut reactors to intelligent responders and from getting compliance in the moment to ensuring the child unfolds into a highly self-esteemed, self-reliant, loving, and thriving person.”
NAOMI ALDORT, author of Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves
“If you want a deeply connected, heart-centered relationship with your child, you owe it to yourself to learn from these masters. ParentShift is one of the most comprehensive and time-tested parenting books around. If you have only one parenting book in your library, this should be the one.”
VICKIE FALCONE, author of Buddha Never Raised Kids & Jesus Didn’t Drive Carpool
“The best thing about ParentShift is the enduring focus on how it’s actually the adults behavior, rather than the child’s, that is most predictive of healthy development. We must grow ourselves before we grow our children. Brilliant!”
VANESSA LAPOINTE, author of Discipline Without Damage
“I’m delighted to endorse a book so thoroughly devoted to a win-win approach to parenting, one that takes the needs of both parents and children into consideration. You’ll find loads of tips, charts, examples, and brief assignments along with easy-to-read text written with empathy and good humor. Here are some of the best tools available to help you build the best possible, mutually respectful, and loving, life-long relationships with your kids.”
JANE BLUESTEIN, author of The Parent’s Little Book of Lists
“Parenting without punishment, threats, rewards, or bribery seemed like a fantasy until Wendy Thomas Russell enrolled in Ty and Linda Hatfield’s Parenting from the Heart course, which draws from Adlerian psychology and its offshoots. In ParentShift—an upbeat, modern guide with classic roots—the coauthors give parents a loving alternative . . . ParentShift presents a thorough set of adaptable ideas. Here, thoughtful parenting comes down to being willing to grow and change right alongside children.”
“A beautiful manual for parents who desire positive change in the parent-child relationship. The depth and scope of this work is profound, vast, and life-changing. Not to be read only once, a resource like this provides valuable support throughout time.”
LYNETTE ANDERSON, director of Hilltop Preschool, Fountain Valley
“They say there’s no how-to book for parenting . . . but this is it.”
JENNY MARDER, mother of two
“ParentShift is quite possibly the only parenting book you will ever need to read. It is so beautifully and clearly written that, as you read, you will better understand not only your children, but yourself. You will shift the way you know your children, deepen your compassion for yourself as you make connections with your own childhood, and become more proactive and responsive in your daily routines. The complete toolkits and the authors’ tried and true resources make this book a one-stop shopping manual for heart-centered parenting.”
Nevin Valentine, child development expert – college professor
“Ty and Linda Hatfield share their cutting-edge expertise in this easy-to-understand guide on raising children that grow into healthy, confident adults. As a marriage and family therapist, I rely on their methods when I work with children and teens. I recommend that every parent read this ground-breaking book.”
Carissa Karner, licensed MFT